The importance of virtue baby project, of which we were part of, cannot be expressed in mere words. We were lucky to be a part of it in person with someone as divine as Dr. Sobti. She enlightened us, motivated us to take this journey. She was the pillar on which we blindly placed our trust throughout.
1. The Journey
It was an experience to be remembered forever, and it started right from the moment I was tested positive. We were new in Ggn from Blr. When I was tested positive, we started searching for a good doctor. I saw on YouTube, a few days back, that a doctor named Dr. Nitika Sobti at Max hospital is brilliant and exceptional in her field. We saw her videos about the virtue baby project and found that to be completely aligned with our thoughts. We were overjoyed and met her right away. We have been under her guidance right from the very start. Dr. Sobti helped us understand the whole process in much needed detail. Each of our issues and questions were answered in simpler and understandable terms. We joined Dr. Sobti virtue baby program with a very pure intention and curiosity, and in the very first class itself, understood the real meaning of parenthood. We attended each and every class that Dr. Sobti conducted, and tried to understand the different aspects of parenthood in detail as well. We even got homeworks to do, and that really made a difference in our lives. We felt connected with our baby in the womb, and it made our journey much more easier and blessed.
2. An Initial Name - Gender Agnostic
We understood the importance of a name, by which we used to address the baby when it was in the womb. We kept a name "chikloo" which we could connect with, irrespective of whether we had a boy or girl. Such was the importance of this, that after a month approx, we got kick-backs from the womb when we called chikloo. Even to this day, his father calls him by the same name, and the baby turns his head as if he understands that someone is calling him.
3. Making a routine for the day
Dr. Sobti told us to fix a schedule for the daily activities which we do with the baby. Be it the virtues telling time, the hanuman chalisa time, the story telling time, the yoga time, the song time or the countless other activities that we did, we made sure that we did them in a scheduled manner at the same time everyday. This really helped us in getting responses from the baby in the form of kicks whenever we did these things. This feedback from the womb made us even more motivated. After some months, if someday I forgot to do some activity at the designated time, the baby would start kicking, reminding us of that something has been missed now. :) That experience was so blissful.
4. Talking to the baby
One thing that surprised us the most, was how the baby responded when we talked to it. Even the day to day activities, when I cooked food for me and my baby, when I ate, what I thought, and all other things influenced Shreejeet. Initially it was a bit weird (to be true) as this activity was talking to my belly :) endlessly We talked with the baby wherever we could, at home, during morning and evening walks etc. But after some time we really felt that we were getting responses from the womb itself. We felt that this was magical. The connection which we established with the baby in the womb continued even after the birth as we still call our prince "chikloo" at home, and he is really connected to the name because it was assigned to him when he was in my womb. At night, after my husband returned from office, he used to talk to Shreejeet about the whole day, about the times he thought about the baby, etc etc. It became a routine and after sometime, if we forgot about some activity someday, Shreejeet used to kick me from inside to remind us for our time together. This is why having a routine matters the most. Even Shreejeet became used to all the different activities at their own specified time and started kicking. We wrote positive affirmations all around the bedroom, and recited them daily while talking to him.
5. Mindful eating, energize the food
We started adopting a holistic approach towards our daily life. We stopped non-veg food, we started cooking the food more often at home. It is said that the intention by which the food is prepared is also very important, hence we followed the information given by Dr. Sobti and Sister Shivani, and cooked at home most of the time. Also before eating or even drinking water, we started energizing them. Following these simple things made sure that we stayed healthy, and got maximum nutrition out of the food which we ate. As guided by Sister Shivani whenever I had cravings I talked with the soul in my womb and explained that we will not have them as its not healthy. By doing this, not only did my cravings got reduced, but I also stopped having them.
6. No Negativity - Positive Thoughts
This is the one thing that impacted our lifestyle the most. No news, no social media, no newspaper, no tv while eating, and nothing except the family before 1 hour of sleep. This made us even more connected, and helped us stay in a positive frame of mind. We curtailed negativity from our lives to the max. extent possible, and that really helped us to relax and think positive about ourselves. We got the womb conversation book, that helped us talk to the baby. We got to know about the various stages of development the baby was going through week by week, and what precautions to take at different stages. We used the affirmations pendrive, which contains many positive affirmations about different aspects of pregnancy, about the roles of father in this journey etc etc. Our daily routine included this, and it calmed our minds and thoughts, and helped us stay optimistic and focused.
7. Settling the karmik account One thing by which we were most influenced from Sister Shivani was settling the karmic account with the baby. We used to tell the baby that whatever happened with him/her in the previous life, let’s forget that and start afresh. We asked the baby that if we had made any mistakes in some other lives please forgive us. This connected our souls and helped stay motivated throughout the entire journey.
8. Yoga and Pranayama
Note: Please make sure you are guided by someone experienced in this process.
This is one of the most under-estimated points in the entire pregnancy, but is one of the most important. In this time, the body goes through a lot of changes, and pranayama helps us keep calm, also early morning pranayama makes sure we get fresh oxygen into our blood. Yoga makes sure that the body is flexible. It also prepares the body for the delivery by some special pre-natal exercises. Aches and body pains will be less if you keep following the routine specified by your yoga teacher. I got my labour pain on 3rd Dec, and even in the night before I did yoga. I am HLA B-27 positive, and have some issues in the L5 spine. I was very skeptical about the use of epidural, as people with spine problems are avoided for epidural. This kept me motivated, I told my baby everyday that mommy has some problems, so we will do a delivery without epidural. And it’s a miracle, I did not have to use epidural.
9. Labour Space at home
Dr. Sobti said in the class that to create a labour space at home, it needs to be a quiet area of your room, and you must sit there for some time everyday and imagine yourself going into labour, and the things that you want to do at that time. If you do not practice well before, you will panic at that moment, and in pain it’s very easy to panic. So to keep things in check, it is better to practice that right from start. I used to sit there, dim the lights and used to think about the points that I wanted to do when I am in labour. I talked to the baby about preparing him for the time he comes into this world. I told him, “There will be light all around, so do not be afraid. When you come out, cry for some time to assure the doctors that you are okay, but do not cry too much cause me and Daddy will be there." All these things made the process so natural when the D-day came. Whatever was told to do I did. Normal breathing, no panic, bear the pain for the beautiful time to come.
10. The D-Day
My expected date of delivery was 8th Dec 2019. On 2nd Dec 2019, 9:00 PM - I had just finished my yoga, had dinner and was doing some household chores, at around 11 PM out of nowhere I felt something watery and the floor became wet. I knew that the water might have broken but was not sure as this we did not practice. :) We reached the hospital at night, and the duty doctor said that the water has broken, and the cervix is around 1 cm. We studied in the virtue baby classes that active labour starts when the cervix is around 8 cm, and it can take up to 48 hours to reach there. Knowledge is not always good :) I was thinking what will happen if this pain continues for that time. Well, the labour space thing certainly helped, and I kept my cool. By around 5:30 am, the pain was unbearable, by around 6:10 the whole water was broken and by around 6:20 the cervix was around 8 cm. We were rushed to the delivery room. This was quick by even Dr. Sobti standards, she was on the way when my husband was able to see the crowning. Dr. Sobti rushed in the labour room and took the charge. She recited prayers for welcoming the baby, where at 7:59 my angel was born. I still get shivers down my spine whenever I think of it, with so many issues in my spine, auto immune condition, without epidural or episiotomy, I delivered in around 6 hours. It is also because I prepared my body for this by yoga right from the beginning, and my mind was prepared by all the practices I did at the labour space at home. The baby was placed on my chest, my husband cut the cord, and we together recited the positive affirmations that we used to tell Shreejeet when he was inside me. We had hanuman chalisa playing throughout the time in the labour room, and that helped us to stay focused. I really want to thank Dr. Sobti, Sister Shivani and the entire team of virtue baby from the bottom of my heart for the angel that they have helped me create. We all can do miracles, we just need to follow the guided path. Finally, I am very thankful to Max hospital for their care and support in this entire process. They also allow husband in the labour room, which helps to make the bond even stronger.